Are You Over-Doing It With Your Kids?

By Karen Jacobson, MA, LCPC, LMFT

There is a lot of talk that today’s parents are:

  • Over-involved in their children’s lives

  • Over-indulging and buying too much

  • Over-scheduling children with too many activities

  • Over-pressuring kids, wanting them to succeed and be superstars

  • Over-praising children in hopes that they will have good self-esteem

  • Over-stimulating kids with computers, videos, electronic games, and cell phones

  • Over-focusing on our children’s happiness

New evidence suggests that in our efforts to give children the best, we end up over-doing it and unknowingly creating some negative consequences for our children.   If you are questioning whether you are over-doing it with your children, it helps to remember the things that your children really need and want.

 TRUE GIFTS CHILDREN NEED AND WANT:

1.       Connection with parents and other appropriate adults

2.       Time and Attention

3.       Acceptance for Who They Are

4.       Unconditional Love

5.       Limits/Boundaries/Consequences

6.       Empathy

7.       Downtime/Boredom

8.       Struggle/ Disappointment/Conflict

9.       Responsibilities

10.    Allowing for Mistakes/Imperfection

11.    Accepting ALL Feelings (even those that are unpleasant)

12.    Teaching  Values

For more information about our online parenting course or parent coaching, contact Karen Jacobson, MA, LCPC, LMFT at 312-330-3194, Karen@parentingperspectives.com or Lauren Bondy, LCSW at 847-562-9503, Lauren@parentingperspectives.com. Or, visit www.parentingperspectives.com.